Nancy Buckwalter

Nancy L. Buckwalter, age 68, of Madison, died peacefully on Sunday, August 23, 2020, in the presence of her wife Sue Hughes and their daughter Kati Buckwalter-Hughes. Nancy lived her life to the fullest and will be remembered for her warm smile and her ever-present sense of humor. Nancy will be deeply missed by her wife Sue and their incredible daughter Kati. Nancy and Sue were life partners for over 39 years and legally married for more than six years. Sue liked to say it was one of the longest engagements on record. Nancy and Sue met in Hartford, CT in 1981 working on the Women’s Center newsletter. They fell in love from the very start, and friends in Hartford said they had the date that never ended. Kati is the dream that Nancy treasured above all else. As Kati would say, Nancy was the mom who “borned” her and Sue was the mom who “held” her in the delivery room in Hartford. After moving to Madison, Wisconsin, Nancy was later promoted to being the English and history mom while Sue was the math and science mom when Kati started school. Kati earned her undergraduate degree in social work from UW-Whitewater and put herself through her MSW program at UW-Milwaukee. Kati now works as a child and family therapist in Milwaukee. To say that Nancy was proud of Kati would be a tremendous understatement.

While Nancy was proud of her career with the State of Wisconsin and of the many hours of volunteer time she devoted to various nonprofits, the essence of her life was with her family and that is how she chooses to be remembered.

Nancy showed fierce determination over many years in working with Jill Davis, MSSW, to restore her mental health following diagnoses of bipolar II disorder and PTSD. Nancy is deeply grateful for the difficult and rewarding work she did with Jill. Having her mental health restored permitted Nancy to be a loving wife to Sue and a caring mother to Kati. There is no greater gift. Nancy brought equal strength and courage to her battle with cancer after being diagnosed with myelodysplastic syndrome, a bone marrow/blood disorder, in October 2017. From then until her death, Nancy spent countless hours in the ER along with frequent admissions to B6/6 at UW Hospital. Sue always liked to say that Nancy loved a new audience for her stories and liked nothing better than hanging out with staff on B6/6. In April 2018, Nancy had a five-week hospitalization on B6/6 for a bone marrow transplant. Nancy would like to extend a special thank you to just a few of the amazing group of practitioners at the Carbone Cancer Clinic and the UW Hospital & Clinics including Mark B. Juckett, MD, her bone marrow transplant doctor; Linda Eckstein, APNP, who traveled this journey with Nancy every step of the way; Dawn Reininger, RN, who pushed Nancy on a cart from the Carbone Clinic to the ER on more than one occasion when Nancy passed out; and Natalie Walsh, RN, who was Nancy’s primary nurse on B6/6  and administered what turned out to be one of the longest bone marrow transplants at UW Hospital by hand when the donor’s marrow from Germany would not cooperate via regular channels. Good times, Natalie, good times! Nancy would also like to thank members of the incredibly compassionate UW Palliative Care Team including Toby Campbell, MD; Chessa Fischer, NP; and Kirsten Worzala Dumke, MDIV.

Nancy is survived by her wife Sue Hughes, her daughter Kati Buckwalter-Hughes, Joe Hughes, Mary (Dan) Sullivan, Jim (Mary Sue) Hughes, CJ (Mary) Hughes, Barb Hughes, Bridget (Frank Manda) Hughes Manda, Todd (Mary) Buckwalter, Cliff (Nita) Buckwalter and numerous beloved nieces, nephews, great nieces and great nephews.

Nancy was pre-deceased by her sister Sandy Buckwalter, her parents Thomas E. and Betty E. Buckwalter, and her brother-in-law Greg Hughes.

Nancy’s only regret would be that she did not live long enough to submit her Absentee Ballot. Please know that if you do not vote in the November election, she will find some way to haunt you from wherever she is now.

In lieu of flowers, please consider making a donation to the nonprofit of your choice. Nancy supported and/or volunteered at the Rape Crisis Center of Dane County; Canopy Center of Dane County, where Nancy volunteered as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) for children; Wisconsin Public Radio; Madison Public Library Foundation; and the Human Rights Campaign.

A celebration of Nancy’s life will be held outdoors at Cress Funeral Home, 3610 Speedway Rd, Madison, at 11 a.m. on Tuesday, September 1, 2020. A gathering beforehand will begin at 10 a.m. Due to COVID-19, only 25 visitors will be allowed at a time during the visitation and service, and those attending are asked to wear a mask and practice social distancing. If you wish to attend via Zoom, please follow this link: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88691087837?pwd=SDBIdEppc2ZZbDdCSndER0k0NDdUQT09

Cress Funeral & Cremation Service

3610 Speedway Road Madison

(608) 238-3434