Stanley Corwin

Stanley Charles Corwin
October 2, 1935 - September 18, 2016

This is the story of Stan (Stash) Corwin, grateful partner of 46 years to Colette (Coli Rabs) Corwin. It's fair to say that Stan won the lottery. If it weren't for Coli and her unbelievable patience and 5 star saintly care and love for Stan, this tribute would have been written years ago. Stan's abiding love for Coli sustained him. Perhaps one of his greatest virtues was his clear and unwavering crush on Coli. Out of respect for who she was, he tried bravely albeit clumsily, to grow himself up so he could be worthy of her and a better partner for her. And so began his religious and spiritual choices. From his Jewish beginnings, he jumped into Catholicism, became a presenter with Coli in Marriage Encounter, studied pastoral ministry, became a Stephen minister, and a spiritual director.

The ripple effect.

Stan insisted his children (David, Lisa and Timon) learn to communicate in the ways that he was learning about. Via letters written and shared face to face, the hope was to reach a deeper and more loving understanding of the other. The "dialoguing" was non-negotiable, keeping with Stan's parenting at that time. His daughter Lisa at age 12 used this to her advantage and chose "going to church" as the topic to write on. Stan wrote of how proud he felt when all of his children were sitting next to him in the pews, how he felt God closer to him when he heard all of his children's voices belting out the hymns along with his own voice. Lisa wrote that she felt like an impostor in the eyes of God, awkward and embarrassed to be in a church when she felt most aligned with a Jewish temple. Tears were shed. Hugs were exchanged. The immediate result of that particular dialogue was Stan giving his daughter the choice of going to church. The long term effect of the dialoguing was a life long love affair with writing letters, not only for Stan but for his children and 11 grandchildren (Agustin, Allie, Anik, Madeline, Alexa, Timothy, Felix, Andrew, Marco, Emma and Oscar.) Stan's quest for learning how to be closer in to those he loved was a central theme to his life and thus began the family get togethers.

There were many.

They were also non-negotiable. The follow through on not disappointing Stan became what gave the families integrity. The children's family's became ones that valued spending time with each other, that could and would put aside their full lives to traipse across the country for one another for the bi-annual reunions. They would cook for each other, attend impromptu T'ai Chi Chih classes with Stan leading (of course), entertain each other with filmed skits, charades, songs, knock out, tennis and stories. And cards.

Always cards.

Oh Hell in the earlier years and then Spades in the later years. Stan took his cards seriously. He kept score, kept track of tricks and winced and shook his head at his own or his partner's poor choices. He liked to talk out each hand. "You know- you could have bid 5 with that hand. You had 4 trump and if you would have led with the ace of diamonds, we could have made our bid." And on devastating hands: "A blind nil?? What were you thinking?" Winning with Stan was glory. "We did it!" High 5s abounded. His eyes lit up. You knew you had done well. You could go to bed content. Losing. Well, Stan wasn't one to lose gracefully. Not in cards or in life. His sharp mind and decisive energy had his eye on the prize- whether it be a card game or his current project. Stan had many projects. He was a doer.

The results of Stan's doing.

There was no sitting on the fence, doing something half-way, hemming or hawing. Stan started something and followed through and the results were generally spectacular. If he was negotiating licenses for General Electric patents, he prepared to win and he usually did. If he was taking on a community service project from helping the poor to championing environmental causes, he was spear-heading it. If he was gardening, he'd self teach himself through rigorous readings. If he signed on for knitting each of his grandchildren a baby blanket, he would take the necessary classes to make it all happen. If he was learning T'ai Chi Chih, he would get certified and become a beloved and dedicated teacher. There was an intensity to Stan and his decisions that made many in his wake move aside while others would run to keep up, hoping to learn or be apart of his passionate drive. Stan was sensitive to those that supported him on his quests and many became his supporters and friends.

The story of Stan's sensitivity and how he loved.

Stan wanted more than anything to bond. He wanted to deepen his relationships with his children, siblings, friends and families. He was persistent. His hope was to hear how you "really" were- down deep. He wanted to be on the inner scoop, the secret keeper, the one that people would seek advice from. And many did.

Stan's way of loving was expressed in his doing. His love in many respects was a classic and traditional love: his letter writing, his phone calls, his supporting each and every trip for his family to see each other, his putting aside funds to support all of his children's and grandchildren's educations. His gifts were hand-made. A cradle, a baby blanket, a love seat, coffee table, wash basket, car top carrier, garden boxes. If Stan could envision a way to build it himself, he would take it on. He was careful and thorough in his work. And Stan worked at what he loved. Every day.

"What a character." The understatement. The truth. Stan would be very content to know that his own story is not finished. The material he provided is enough to generate stories for years to come. Dynamic personalities are wonderfully generous in that way.

Share a Stan story on the Tribute page of Cress Funeral Home, under Stan's page.
https://www.cressfuneralservice.com/obituary/158068/Stanley-Corwin/#tributes

Other donations can be made to T'ai Chi Chih International.
Stan wanted to support scholarships for new teachers.
https://donate.makemydonation.org/donate/462975955


Cress Funeral Service
3610 Speedway Road, Madison
(608) 238-3434